It’s Time for Your Q3 Performance Review

Every quarter, your household’s Chief Feline Officer (CFO) conducts a review of your performance for the preceding 90 days. You are evaluated on critical KPIs: meal punctuality, lap availability, sunbeam management, and enrichment delivery. 

Your results for Q3 2025 are… mixed. Please see below for comments from your CFO and your goals for Q4.

1. Meal Service Punctuality

Strengths: Knows where the treats are stored.
Opportunities: Breakfast delivery variance ±27 minutes.
Q4 Goals: Achieve ±10 minutes; rehearse opening cans quietly; respect pre-breakfast chorus.

CFO Comment: I submitted my request at 5:04 a.m. Per our service level agreement (SLA), please address.

2. Facilities & Comfort

Strengths: Window seat installed; blanket rotation acceptable.
Opportunities: Vacuuming during core nap hours (11:00–3:00) flagged.
Q4 Goals: Add one heated bed; verify sunbeam alignment on weekends.

CFO Comment: The blue blanket is approved for biscuits. Others remain under review.

3. Litter Box Logistics

Strengths: Daily scooping mostly on time.
Opportunities: The ‘Friday refresh’ slipped. Number of boxes does not yet meet “n+1” standard.
Q4 Goals: Scoop daily; full refresh weekly; box count ≥ number of cats.

CFO Comment: We appreciate your commitment to continuous improvement in this area.

4. Wellness & Enrichment

Strengths: Wand toy technique improving; lap warmth consistent.
Opportunities: Enrichment delivered ad hoc vs. scheduled.
Q4 Goals: Two 10-minute play sessions daily; introduce food puzzle; expand vertical territory.

CFO Comment: Please stop throwing the toy at me. I prefer to hunt it.

5. Communication & Respect

Strengths: Adept at slow-blink.
Opportunities: Frequently misinterprets “tail flick” memo; still learning ‘do not pick up’ hours.
Q4 Goals: Observe body language; adopt ‘consent before cuddles’ policy during naps.

CFO Comment: I will schedule you for remedial ear-angle literacy.

Professional Development

Action Items:
- Sunbeam Optimization: Map sunbeam times; place bed/perch accordingly; review weekly. - Complete “Safe Meal Service” (wide, shallow bowls; fresh water twice daily).
- Inbox Zero (Toy Edition): Rotate 5 toys/week; retire frayed items; log top 3 favorites.

Final Remarks

Solid fundamentals. Tighten breakfast SLAs and standardize daily play, and we foresee strong purr ROI across Q4.